Welcome to the Secretary General
Wednesday, October 11th, 2006The great majority of ordinary Irish people join with me in congratulating Ban Ki Moon in his election as next Secretary General of the United Nations. His credentials were impressive from many points of view, one of them surely being that he returns us to a fine tradition of monosyllabism in the names of UN SecGens., including such greats as Kurt, Dag and U (-remember U Thant?)
Of course one can expect the British tabloids to make hay regularly with the SecGens name…….Just think what they might do with concepts such as “..the phases of the Moon..”, “..Half Moon bay…”, “…the moon sees me…”, Moon landing…”, “ the pale Moon was rising…”. One can just imagine some of the headlines…but we’ll leave it to the Brits, they’re good at that sort of stuff.
What we in Ireland must now start thinking of is Ban Ki Moons successor. We need a candidate !. And “Dermot” or “Bartholomew” (both Aherns) are just not …”right”, if you get me. Not for UN Secretary General !. Mary R. got to be number 2 and that was good, but I don’t see a comeback. “Desi” would have been credible, but he seems to have given up. No, it looks like Bono, folks, a great name in the Kofi tradition and a guy who would sure be up for it. Ok, its two syllables, but the other highly qualified candidate, Peter Sutherland….well, you know, “Peeter….Peeeeeter..”- .it sort of slips too far. Unless, of course he was to shorten it….”Pete” Sutherland….that’s cool….sounds like a bit of a rocker, though, and maybe his colleagues on the board of British Petroleum wouldn’t be happy with a Chairman with a name like that….
So, is it to be Bono, then? We should get behind him as a nation and start promoting him now!. Get your bets on quickly before Paddy Power hears….remember what happened at the Rose of Tralee, odds dropping from 66 to evens overnight !
But wait !…Late news from the jockeys’ room….a new candidate……….Suds has done it.!……he’s B. Pete! ..Oh, whadda name, its terrific….he sounds (and looks) Buddist or something….just Perfect ! B Pete….yes, I can see it! That’s our man!
Of course Bono could legitimately call himself U, too…..
Well, anyway, well done, Ban Ki, and best of luck to you.
Dag Kurt U Thant B Pete U Too
